No Rain (No Sports)

“All I can say is that my life is pretty plain

You don't like my point of view and I'm insane” (No Rain, Blind Melon). 

I didn't always turn my nose up at America's favorite escape, professional sports, in fact I used to be drawn to them in different ways. You couldn't live where I grew up and ignore football, it wasn't possible. Hockey was cool because of movies like the Mighty Ducks. Baseball was fun because of the Sandlot and because kids still talked about actual baseball cards. I did some practice goaltending for soccer. And, I had a basketball hoop on the garage.

In the fourth grade, I learned how to throw a spiral pass in gym class, something I still remember how to do today (it was taught incredibly well). I loved the idea of playing ice hockey or even roller hockey, mostly because of movies, but I knew early on that I could barely stay steady on my feet let alone on a pair of blades. 

I still have the baseball bats I've had since I was a kid. Not having depth perception makes baseball a little tricky and risky as far as not getting hit by the ball a lot, but I'll never forget that feeling the first time I connected a line drive, and then quickly realized that I had to retrieve my baseball. I still have my baseball card collection. 

I had two life sized posters in my room growing up. Hulk Hogan and Dikembe Mutombo. I loved shooting hoops! I spent a lot of summer nights out at my basketball hoop. At one point I could shoot baskets without missing. Of course, none of these sports captivated me like professional wrestling. But, I enjoyed them for a long time. 

What changed to cause me to go from casual sports enthusiast to active avoidance? Exclusion, competition, and adolescence. For a number of years, I got to participate in recreational sports with my peers. But, little by little I was forced out because of my physical limitations. 

Eventually, I grew tired of getting picked last. I didn't like that people started opting for full contact football instead of passing the ball. It didn't take too many tackles to determine that wasn't a good idea for me. Hockey and my balance didn't mix well (same for roller skates in general). 

But, one can watch sports and not play them right? Of course, and I have. Most of them are only fun for me to watch in person rather than on TV. I never liked watching baseball on TV but, like the hockey puck in hockey, TV was the only way I could see the ball because my vision is so bad. If you ever attended a baseball game with me, this is why I eventually stop paying attention because I can't see what's happening. It didn't stop me from going though. I've been to more professional baseball games than any other sport (including professional wrestling, which I've watched religiously for decades). 

I don't like competition, I never have. To me, competition is about superiority and that leaves a bad taste in my mouth. But, if you're not into American sports, it puts you in a weird position. For me, that was part choice and part natural exclusion due to physical limitations. 

But, I watched the Broncos win two Superbowls and their fans destroy a city in excitement (that was a turning point for me). I watched the Avalanche win their first Stanley Cup with my family – it's one of the best sporting events I've ever seen. I've been to quite a few Rockies games and some really bad Nuggets games. 

But, my favorite non-sport, professional wrestling I was told was fake by a classmate, and to me it didn't seem any less real at the time than professional sports. Between things like that and being picked less and less to join in, I withdrew from sports. I began to form an objection to the general sports culture in America. I didn't feel welcomed in it, so I returned the rejection. Today, I see sports as a symbol of a lot of things I don't like about the world around me and the way people treat people.

I recognize my own judgement and criticism of something millions of people love. I wanted to love it too, but it was another space that made me feel less than others. But, as you can see from the stories above, I've had a few moments of positive sports experiences. To this day, I enjoy professional wrestling more than sports and in an ironic twist, professional wrestling is the reason I watched every game of the 2001 season of the defunct XFL. It's the most interesting I've ever found football to be. 

I focused these stories on team sports for a few reasons. Teams are about belonging and I wasn't on the team. Groups have also excluded me because of my CP more than individuals have. It's group mentality that drove me to vocally reject sports, especially football. But, even I can appreciate the greats like Michael Jordan, and I was one of the millions watching Mike Tyson make his boxing return this past November. 

I've built a meaningful life, largely without sports as a backdrop. I've witnessed more WrestleMania events than Superbowls and I'm quite alright with that. I'd rather read, watch a movie, or write than watch sports and I've found belonging amongst others who don't pay attention to sports. People like me are the reason Taylor Swift was good for the Superbowl, likewise it's why pro wrestling brings in celebrities so that the casual observer of that will pay attention.